四人英语话剧搞笑剧本5分钟

C,the customer. W,the waiter. M,the manager. In the restaurant. W:What can I do for you,sir? C:Beijing Roast Duck,Tomato and Egg Soup.That's all. W:A moment. W:Yours,sir. C:Thank you. C:Waiter. W:Yes?Sir. C:How can I have the soup? W:I'm sorry.Sir.I'll change it for you. W:Here your soup.Sir. C:Thank you. C:waiter! W:Sir. C:How can I have the soup? W:Er.I'm terribly sorry.I change it in a second. C:Sir.I'm sorry for the soup.Now is the soup. W:OK. C:Waiter!! W:Sir? C:Call your manager,please. M:I'm sorry,sir,but what's wrong with the soup? C:How can I have the soup without a SPOON

或是白雪公主与七个小矮人 Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs 英文短剧本

旁白：Once upon a time, there was a queen. She had a pretty daughter named Snow White. Soon after the child was born, the queen died. The queen married another queen. The stepmother was very jealous. She dressed Snow White in rags and forced her to do the housework all day and all night, such as sweep and mop the floor, do some cleaning, carry water and so on.

白雪：( Sweep and mop the floor, do some cleaning, carry water and so on.)

皇后：I’m the new queen. I’m very beautiful. you see. If anyone is more beautiful than me, I’ll kill her. I have a magic mirror. If I want to know something, It will tell me surely.Now, mirror, mirror, come here!

魔镜：Yes, I’m coming. Your Majesty! What do you want to know?

皇后：Mirror, mirror, on the wall.Who is the fairest of the all?

魔镜：Yes. Your Majesty! You are the fairest of all, I think.But there is a young lady. She is as white as snow, as red as rose and as black as ebony.She is much more beautiful than you.

皇后：She is much more beautiful than me?Who is she? Tell me quickly.

再或是叶花K西

人物介绍：西门吹雪（X），叶孤城（Y），King(K).花满楼（H）

道具：牛奶两袋，匕首一把，戒子一枚，纸屑若干。

第一幕：决战紫荆城之颠

旁白：A quiet villageiscoveredwithwhitesnow .

Birdsaredancinginthecold .

Amaniswalkingalongthestreet ,stepbystep .

Windiscominginsilence.

Another mysteriousmanapproaches .

Y与X相遇．

X：oH ,Iamsorrytoknockyou !

Y:Haha, Nevermindbaybay.

X:Excuseme， whoareyouonearth? couldyoutellmeyourname?

Y:ha ha ,Iwon’tchangemyname! nomatterwhathappens. I’mthemostfamous-------YeGucheng. Whoareyou?

X:Iamximenchuixue.

Y惊讶:Ar, ximenchui xue?

X:Yes,whatiswrong?

Y:IheardthatyouarethebestingMartialArts?

X:Great, youknowme !

Y抱腿：Please, please…… Don’tkillme! letmeyougo!

X:No, Imustkillyou !

Y:Idon''''''''''''''''twanttobekilled.Thereare aeighty-year-oldmotheandathree-yearold sontobelookedafterbyme!

X:Noway! Becausewearefightingnow!youknow?

Y突然站起冷冷的说：Don''''''''''''''''t forceme!

X:Pardon!

(Y拿出一袋牛奶)

X抢过牛奶:milk, verygood! Ilikedrinkingit. howdoyouknowthat?

Y:pleasedrinkit!

X喝完牛奶:Thanks, ha,ha

Y:Doyoustillwanttokillme?

X:Sure, must! milkismilk.

Y(恼怒+冷酷):Verygood! verygood! Ihopeyouwillnotforgetwhatyousaid!?

X:I’msureIwon’t!

Y:Imustgiveyoualesson!IfIdon''''''''''''''''tbeatyourthistime, you’llneverbehaveproperly!3-2-1-0!

X捂着肚子，蹲下：Oach,Oach !

Y大笑：HaHa……

X可怜状: help! help! Whereisthewashroom?

Y:What ?

X:Toliet?

Y:What ?

X:The “WC”?

Y:Oh,I see ,goalongthisstreetandturnrightwhenyouseeacorssingroad!

X:Thanks,byebye.

Y掏出纸屑吹:Thisisgenuirnesnow!

H:Stop!Protectingtheenvironmentisabasicobligation!

Y:Whoareyou?

H:Hua---man----lou! Haveyouseenximenchuixue?

Y:Yes, hewasbeatenbymeandisin“WC” now,ha……

H惊讶:Nowyouarethebestintheworld!

Y:Youareright!

H:Teriffic!youaretheonemykinglookingfor! doyouwantjoininus?

Y:Yes,It’sverygood.

H:Ok, followme, Let’sgotoseemyking!

Y:Ok,Let’s go

http://blog.sina.com.cn/s/blog_5e9fa0040100dco1.html 是《喜羊羊与灰太狼》的。已经大获成功，视频：http://blog.sina.com.cn/s/blog_5e9fa0040100dgzd.html~type=v5_one&label=rela_nextarticle

话剧《麦琪的礼物》中英文对白：http://wenku.baidu.com/view/f510b6946bec0975f465e251.html 希望可以帮到你！更多可点击：http://www.chinaticket.com/ 关注中票在线，了解最新的演出资讯！ 欢迎在微信添加好友里搜索：chinaticketvip ，加中票在线为微信好友。

给你多发了几个，你看行不行

BOSSY: Whiskey! Give me whiskey! DAISY: No more whiskey。 You’ve drunk too much。 Now go to bed to have a rest。   BOSSY: Just wine is enough… OK! If you don’t take it, I’ll get it myself! DAISY: No way! You mustn’t do that。     BOSSY: You old witch! DAISY (cry):Help! NOISY: Shall we go to the park? LAZY: Good idea! CRAZY: That sounds really good。   But you see, we are not sure if your father will let us go out, so you’d better ask him first。   LAZY: Yes, you’re right。   Let’s go to ask him。 LAZY: Daddy? BOSSY:……… LAZY: You look so handsome today… LAZY: …and very kind。   And I think if you let us go to the park。   You’ll be the best father in the world。 BOSSY: Really? OK。   Go ahead。 DAISY: Stop!…Both of you can go, no problem, but Noisy must stay here。   NOISY: Well。   I just want to go with them and then do my housework。 DAISY: Yes, you mustn’t go anywhere until all the work is finishes。     LAZY: But I want her to go with me! You see, if I go there without her, then I won’t enjoy myself! CRAZY: Why? That sounds really strange! You said you cannot leave her, why is that? She is only a maid! LAZY: Shut up! You don’t understand at all。     She is, she is my GF! CRAZY: What! I… BOSSY: You are only ten! How can you have two GF? Yes, when you declared that Crazy is yours, I have no attitude —— That is because her family is a rich one—— DAISY: Then we saw you buy chocolate for her, take her to the cinema。     BOSSY: And I’ve already fed up。You had been fired。 This is the wage for today, now go to take your package and go away。   NOISY:……Peacock flies to southeast。   And there is a wander once five miles。 LAZY: You cannot do that Dad! You cannot… CRAZY: Shut up! BOSSY: Go, can’t you hear? Go to the devil! LAZY: OK, Dad, if you determined to drive Noisy away, I’ll go with her。     Don’t be afraid。 Let’s go together。 DAISY: Oh dear, what shall we do then? BOSSY: Whiskey! Give me whiskey!。

The Gifts （礼物）英文话剧剧本 The Gifts Mon.：Tomorrow will be Christmas. But Della feels very sad. Because she has no money to buy a present for her husband , Jim . She has only one dollar and eighty-seven cents4人短剧。由欧·亨利的短篇小说麦琪的礼物改编。

The Gifts

Mon.：Tomorrow will be Christmas. But Della feels very sad. Because she has no money to buy a present for her husband , Jim . She has only one dollar and eighty-seven cents . They have only 20 dollars a week, it doesn’t leave much for saving.

In fact, Della and Jim have two possessions in which they both take very great pride. One is Jim’s gold watch, which has been his father’s and his grandfather’s. The other is Della’s long beautiful hair.

D: Life is so hard for me. Though I saved the money for many months , I still have only one dollar and eighty seven cents.

D: I—- I—- I have to have my hair cut and sold it . In that way I can get some money and I can buy a beautiful present for Jim.

(At the shop—“Madame Sofronie. We Buy Hair Goods of All Kinds”)

D: Will you buy my hair?

M: Yes, I buy all kinds of hair. Sit down, please. Take your hat off and let me have a look. Oh, very beautiful. Very good! Twenty dollars , OK?

D: All right. But please give it to me quickly.

M: Here you are. Twenty dollars.

D: Thank you. Bye.

M: Bye.

Mon.：Della spent two hours in the streets. Then she stopped at a Gold Shop and bought a gold watch chain. Now ,Della is at home.

D: Oh, what a beautiful gold watch chain. I think it must match Jim’s watch. When he sees it he must be very happy .

(Suddenly the door opened and in came Jim . )

J: You—–?

D: Jim. Don’t look at me that way. I had my hair cut off and sold it because I couldn’t have lived through Christmas without giving you a present. Jim, it will grow quickly. You don’t mind, do you ? I just had to do it. My hair grows very fast, you know. Say “Merry Christmas!” Jim, and let’s be happy.

J: You’ve cut off your hair?

D: I’ve cut it off and sold it. It’s sold. I tell you -sold and gone, too. It’s Christmas Eve , Jim. Be good to me, for it went for you.

J: Well , Della. Don’t make any mistake about me. I don’t think there’s anything about a hair cut that could make me love you any less. I know, it went for me. Look at this package .

D: What ?

J: Look at it yourself. You ‘ll see.

D:Ah! The combs. They were in the shop windows for many months!

J:Yes, the beautiful combs, pure tortoiseshell, with jewelry rims–just the color to wear in your beautiful, hair.

D: But , Jim. They are expensive combs. I know, my heart had longed for them without the least hope of possession. Now they are mine. Thank you Jim.

J; Now, you will see why I was upset at first.

D: Jim, you don’t know what a nice –what a beautiful , nice gift I’ve got for you. Can you guess?

J: I’m sorry. I won’t guess.

D: Look. A gold watch chain. Isn’t it lovely ,Jim? I hunted all over the town to find it. You’ll have to look at the time a hundred times a day now. Give me your watch. I want to see how it looks on it .

J: Della, Let’s put our Christmas gifts away and keep them a while. They’re too nice to use just at present. I sold the watch to get the money. And I bought the combs. Now, Let’s have our supper.

礼 物

旁白：明天是圣诞节，但是德拉觉得很难过，因为她无钱为她丈夫吉姆买一圣诞礼物，她只有1.87美元，他们一个月只有20美元的收入，那很难再从中省钱了。

事实上，德拉和吉姆有两件让他们引以为豪的宝贝，一件是吉姆的金表，那是从他祖父和父亲那里留传下来的，还有一件是德拉那一头棕发，又长又美丽。

德拉：生活对我来说很困难，虽然我很多个月以前就开始存钱了，我仍然只有1.87美元。

德拉：我……我……我不得不剪了头发去卖掉，那样我就能得到一些钱去买礼物给吉姆了。

（在店门口，写着“夫人：我们买各种各样的头发”）

德拉：你买我的头发吗？

夫人：是的，我们买各式的头发，把你的帽子脱下来，让我看一下你的头发。哦，很美的头发，很好的发质，20美元，行不行？

德拉：好的，但是请你快点把钱给我。

夫人：给你，20美元。

德拉：谢谢你，再见。

夫人：再见。

旁白：德拉在街上逛了2个小时，然后她在一家金店止步，进去买了一条金表链。现在德拉正在家里。

德拉：哦，多么漂亮的金链子，我想那一定跟吉姆的手表很配，当他看到它的时候，一定会很高兴的。

（突然门打开了，吉姆走了进来）

吉姆：你……？

德拉：吉姆，不要那样看着我，我剪了我的头发并卖了，因为我无法度过一个我不送你圣诞节礼物的圣诞节，吉姆，它会长得很快的，你不会介意的，是不是？我必须这么做，我的头发长得很快的，这你是知道的，说：“圣诞快乐！”，吉姆，让我们高兴起来。

吉姆：你剪了你的头发？

德拉：我剪了头发并卖了，它被卖掉了，我跟你说它被卖掉了，没有了！现在是圣诞节前夜，对我好一点，吉姆，那都是为了你。

吉姆：哦，德拉，别误会我，我想我不会因为你剪了头发而对你的爱就减少了，我知道，那是为了我，看看这个包裹。

德拉：什么？

吉姆：你自己看吧！你会明白的。

德拉：啊，是梳子！它们就是几个月前陈列在橱窗里的那套。

吉姆：是的，那套漂亮的梳子，镶珠宝的，那颜色正好配你的发色。

德拉：但是，吉姆，那些都是很贵的，我知道，我一直渴望但却没有丝毫的奢望拥有它。现在，它们是我的了，谢谢你，吉姆。

吉姆：现在，你知道我为什么一开始就那么悲伤了吧。

德拉：吉姆，我给你买了一件又美丽又好的礼物，你能猜出来吗？

吉姆：对不起，我不想猜。

德拉：看，一条金表链，吉姆，它是不是很可爱？我找遍了整个城才找

的，你从现在起可得一天要看一百次时间了。把你的表给我，我

想看一下表链装在表上的样子。

吉姆：德拉，让我们把圣诞礼物收起来珍藏一段时间，它们太好了，但我

们现在用不着，我把表卖了。得到了钱才买了这梳子。现在让我们

吃晚饭吧

A：Rabbit B：Mountain C： Tree D： River Summary This story talks about some nature members want to have a party one day. But the party becomes a condem. Prologue: (The voice-over) It’s a beautiful sunny day! A little white rabbit jump out of her hole and run here and there happily. Then the story begin

小玲趴在桌上睡觉。 小艾丢了本书在旁边，出去。 小伍进来，坐在小艾的位置上。 小艾（进来）：唉，哥们儿，真是莫名其妙，是不是在搞笑，难道你没看到，这个座我已经占了！ 小伍：丁是丁，卯是卯，其实我占的比你早！ 小艾：我一大早就来了，咋没看见你呢？ 小伍：我昨天晚上占的。 小艾：最后一排是我的专利！为了它，我每天早早地起了床，抢破了头，血直流，这个位置不能丢！ 小伍：最后一排是我的骄傲，风水宝地这边独好。要想把我从这赶跑（小艾：——咋地？）劝你趁早拉倒！ 小玲醒来：吵什么吵什么吵？ 一大早就在这么神圣的教室里吵架，浪费大好青春！ 知道你们犯了什么错误吗？啊？ 小艾：知道。 小伍：我们不吵了。 小玲

新生：“（从台边走出，像是在闲逛）我是##级新生，方年16，未婚。本人才高八斗，气宇轩昂，上知天文下知地理，是无所不知无所不晓无所不能！今天忽闻我学学生会要招收新生做干部，本来对做官是毫无兴趣，但听说做个学生会干部还挺威风的？就去看看吧！” （摇晃到学生会） 新生： “哗！ 一进门就是就是学习部，我们学校果然还是以学习为主啊！” 学干部：（新生刚一进门就碰到了学习部部长，只见她手捧诗集在那边充满感情的朗诵）“床前明月光，疑是地上霜。举头望明月，低头思故乡！”（汗！！！！！） 新生：（鼓掌走向他，当然是用拍马屁的语气说了）“想必这位一定就是学习部部长吧！小生拜见！！”（两手作揖） 学干部：“哦，

阿甘正传的片断 FORREST (voice-over) That Momma, she sure was right. It's funny how things work out. EXT. BAYOU LA BATRE/BUBBA'S MOM'S HOUSE - DAY Forrest walks up to a shack on the edge of the Bayou. A group of black kids play in the front yard. FORREST (voice-over) I didn't stay home for long, because I'd

《孔雀东南飞》（英文搞笑话剧） 本文来自:恒星英语学习网(www.Hxen.com)详细出处参考： http://www.hxen.com/yingyujuben/2007-03-30/4960.htmlWanderseveryfivemiles 焦仲卿Johnny(Jforshort)刘兰芝Lunch(Lforshort) 焦母Johnny’smother(JMforshort)刘母Lunch’smother(LMforshort) 太守之子Mayor’sson(MSforshort)强盗Burglars(ABandC) Prologue (J作被打状跑上台,内砸出一卷纸筒,J被打中,狼狈不

甲:Hello,every one, have you ever seen the movie? Yeah, you are right, I'm the director-- Cameron Diaz, applaud , thank you....Recently, I will direct a new movie called < Avatar 2 >, today, there will be a audition and I will select three actresses who can get the chance to perform in this f

“哦——!”怎么回事?为什么五(1)班教师这么热闹?原来，老师布置给了大家一个作业，让大家在周末拍一张照片，谁的最新奇，谁的就最好!同学们个个摩拳擦掌，兴奋不已。 星期六，小番茄同学拿着他的相机，在大街上走着。边走边想：老师说要新奇，那么我就拍一张……一张滑稽的照片吧!可是……哪里有机会拍呢……“嘿嘿，小猴，翻跟斗!翻跟斗!……”不远处的一个院子里，有许多人在看小猴的表演，这时，小番茄眼前一亮：“耍猴不是很滑稽吗?说不定还有一些意外的收获呢!”于是，他一蹦一跳地跑了过去，正巧这时大家被小猴逗得哈哈大笑，而小猴也兴致正高，走钢丝走完了，又翻起了跟斗，这会儿又在转手帕……小番茄也跟着大家一起鼓掌

生活大爆炸有很多不错的片段 但有很多人找不到美剧的笑点 =-=

《孔雀东南飞》 焦仲卿Johnny(Jforshort)刘兰芝Lunch(Lforshort) 焦母Johnny’smother(JMforshort)刘母Lunch’smother(LMforshort) 太守之子Mayor’sson(MSforshort)强盗Burglars(ABandC) Prologue (J作被打状跑上台,内砸出一卷纸筒,J被打中,狼狈不堪) J:EverybodysaysthatI’mhenpecked,butinfact,I’masstrongasatiger,(小声)whilemy wifeisWuSong. (指着上台处的门大声道)I’mnotafraido

绝对是搞笑英语剧本: Narration: Carrie, Cici and Wing are co-worker of a company. This day they are talking in the office. Ca: Bingo!du I finally finish this case. It is really tough! I have not slept well for almost a week. Wing: Me too .I always get so busy in this season. I have drunk three cups of coffee

小玲趴在桌上睡觉。 小艾丢了本书在旁边，出去。 小伍进来，坐在小艾的位置上。 小艾（进来）：唉，哥们儿，真是莫名其妙，是不是在搞笑，难道你没看到，这个座我已经占了！ 小伍：丁是丁，卯是卯，其实我占的比你早！ 小艾：我一大早就来了，咋没看见你呢？ 小伍：我昨天晚上占的。 小艾：最后一排是我的专利！为了它，我每天早早地起了床，抢破了头，血直流，这个位置不能丢！ 小伍：最后一排是我的骄傲，风水宝地这边独好。要想把我从这赶跑（小艾：——咋地？）劝你趁早拉倒！ 小玲醒来：吵什么吵什么吵？ 一大早就在这么神圣的教室里吵架，浪费大好青春！ 知道你们犯了什么错误吗？啊？ 小艾：知道。 小伍：我们不吵了。 小玲

旁白:Long long ago, there were three little pigs living with their mother. They were very happy and they were very kind to their friends. Look! They are coming! (情景一:猪妈妈和三只小猪在森林里快乐的玩耍)(加快乐的音乐 ) M: babies, Come on! Pp:Here we come! M: Let’s do some exercises. Lift your arms. Bend your knees. Touch your

穷开心：别人开心是真开心，我开心真是穷开心，不管三七二十一，开心茶馆寻开心，准开心，你说是不是！。 观众：是。 二、情景表演部份 穷开心手拿一张假百元钞票独白：你说人倒霉来，盐罐生咀，喝水塞牙，放屁伤人，走路扭脚，什么时候混进了一张假币幺冻冻（100）。 穷开心用手掌打了一下自己的脸骂：白睁着一双金鱼豹眼。 穷开心露出狡诈的笑容：道高一尺，魔高一丈，有法子了。 老开心上，老开心站在服务台上笑脸迎接穷开心，穷开心坐在茶桌上，跷起二郎腿。 老开心：小妹上茶。 穷开心：上最好的碧螺春，外加一盘开心果。 小开心端着茶水上：老板，开心茶馆，喝碧螺春，嚼开心果，开开心心，今天开心明天开心天天开心月月开心年

甲：你好！ 乙：你好！ 甲：你是谁？ 乙：我是我！ 甲：没见过你！ 乙：你当然没见过我！因为我也从来没见过你!

The Gifts （礼物）英文话剧剧本 The Gifts Mon.：Tomorrow will be Christmas. But Della feels very sad. Because she has no money to buy a present for her husband , Jim . She has only one dollar and eighty-seven cents4人短剧。由欧·亨利的短篇小说麦琪的礼物改编。 The Gifts Mon.：Tomorrow will be Christmas. But Della feels very sad. Becau

荆珂刺秦王搞笑英语话剧剧本 旁白(Aside )/介绍（Introduction）： Long ago there was a crazy country, in this crazy country there were some crazy people, trying to show the crazy history by crazy ways. Mr Jingke was the most famous swordsman and was sent to kill king of Qing, “Yingzheng”. But finally he failed. Do you wan

Aside: You can't see your hand in front of you in one at night, pitch-dark forest have one one black little girl running alarmed of clothing. (princess appears on the stage , the black clothing runs and encloses ) she is in rags, the complexion is wan and sallow , turn one's head and look around fre

给你多发了几个，你看行不行

A: Excuse me, can you tell me the way to Hailing Park? B: Sorry, I'm new here. You can that woman. A: Thanks. B: Not at all. A: Excuse me, Where is Hailing Park? C: Er... I'm not sure. You may ask the policeman. A: Thank you. C: It's my pleasure. A: Excuse me, sir, can you tell me how to get toHaili

考试疯云（校园小品） 人物：小艾，小伍，小玲，老师 场景：教室 内容： 小玲趴在桌上睡觉。 小艾丢了本书在旁边，出去。 小伍进来，坐在小艾的位置上。 小艾（进来）：唉，哥们儿，真是莫名其妙，是不是在搞笑，难道你没看到，这个座我已经占了！ 小伍：丁是丁，卯是卯，其实我占的比你早！ 小艾：我一大早就来了，咋没看见你呢？ 小伍：我昨天晚上占的。 小艾：最后一排是我的专利！为了它，我每天早早地起了床，抢破了头，血直流，这个位置不能丢！ 小伍：最后一排是我的骄傲，风水宝地这边独好。要想把我从这赶跑（小艾：——咋地？）劝你趁早拉倒！ 小玲醒来：吵什么吵什么吵？ 一大早就在这么神圣的教室里吵架，浪费大好青春

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你们几个人？总得描述下要求吧。。